Tips for Handling Arguments and Differences

The way our faces and looks are different, so are our habits, attitudes, and beliefs. We cannot all behave or act the same way. We cannot believe the same things or have the same opinion on some subjects. People’s beliefs and characters are sometimes a result of experiences, relationships, background, or temperament. These factors can determine how people respond to certain situations. Because our Experiences and Backgrounds are unique, our disposition towards life and people would differ from person to person.

These differences are part of the reasons why we find some people to be difficult, and this does not mean we would only relate with people who reason or think like us alone. We cannot be friends with only those who agree with our ideas and opinions; we must find a way to manage and deal with those differences. Necessarily, managing our differences is a skill that we must master.

Not understanding these differences can complicate our relationships with people; there are acquaintances, colleagues, or even family members we constantly do not get along with, and this sometimes results in arguments and conflicts. People argue because of differences in opinions and thoughts; everyone likes to be right with their point of view. When you question their beliefs, there is the tendency for people to get defensive which can escalate into conflicts when managed poorly. Arguments, when handled correctly, can be positive and healthy in relationships.

While some people are being difficult to frustrate you, others have just been affected by certain conditions that now affect their response to people and situations or are just acting out a temperamental weakness.

Instead of focusing on why people can be so hard to get along with, we can look for ways to manage the differences in our relationship with people. These tips will help you handle arguments and differences better.

1. 1. Don’t try to change them: Yes. Don’t see difficult people as your next big project and go on trying to change them. It is better to talk to them and explain how their actions make you feel rather than try to transform them into who you want to see. In most cases, demanding a change or enforcing it on difficult people always results in arguments and conflicts that further complicate things.
   2. Stay Calm: I get that this is not as easy as it sounds, since there is a very high tendency to want to attack right back or defend yourself when someone attacks you. Immediately reacting to a difficult person will most likely make the situation worse than it originally was. On the contrary, the ability to remain calm and wait a while before responding can deescalate what should have resulted in an argument and help identify a much better solution.
   3. Respect their opinion: Typically, downplaying a person’s opinion about a matter can be infuriating. Difficult people are still Humans, and nobody likes to be treated like they are stupid or incompetent. Do not disrespect them even when you do not agree with their opinion or actions. Showing them respect is a great way to handle differences in opinion.
   4. Listen actively: When dealing with a difficult person, listen to understand them and not just respond or react. Try to understand the reason for their actions and how to help. Sometimes, they are just going through a trying time and are venting the wrong way. Those times when they are hard to deal with, are when they should be listened to the most.
   5. Be kind: Someone who is being difficult could use some kindness. Oftentimes, people respond positively to kindness and that might just be what that person needs. Kindness reaches out to a difficult person much more than being difficult in return can.
   6. Confront them: Confrontation is not always wrong. Sometimes, it is better to stand up for yourself and declare boundaries. Don’t allow them to keep treating you poorly and don’t be afraid of speaking up for yourself. When you’re confronting a difficult person, choose your words carefully and communicate your grievances constructively.
   7. Ignore them: When it seems like there is nothing else that can be done to manage a difficult person, ignoring them may be something to consider. If they cannot be avoided completely, it’s best to ignore them as much as possible.
   8. Look inward: We also need to check if there is nothing in us that makes a person react a certain way.

I hope these tips help make your relationship with people better.